Fear and Guilt
by ninjaturtlefinatic
Summary: The ninja are settling in after their big battle with Garmadon. Everything seems great until Jay is abducted by a mysterious man. And no one knows what he wants. (Jaya and platonic Bruiseshipping) -Contains minor language and lightly suggestive themes- (Possibly being discontinued)
1. Chapter 1

**First of all I just want to thank every one who reviewed my first story 'Just How Much Can Memories Hurt?' I honestly can't believe y'all liked it so much. Anyway this story is going to be a darker than my last one so it's rated T for safety. This story will have mild language and some mature themes but nothing explicit so just be warned. There will be possible trigger warnings but I will give you a head's up at the beginning of a chapter if there is one. There will be Jaya and PLATONIC Bruiseshipping. So if you're looking for romantic JayxCole, this isn't the place for you.**

 **I hope you enjoy it. If you do please review, it really gives me motivation to keep writing. This story takes place after Hunted.**

 **I don't own Ninjago**

* * *

"It was amazing. We hadn't been on a date in so long."

Jay was going on and on about he and Nya's date following their return from the first realm while he and Cole we're walking through Ninjago City. They just finished cleaning the Royal Palace a couple days ago and they were all exhausted. Sensei Wu had given them a few days to themselves while he went off on a personal journey to meditate for a while.

After all, being constantly chased by deranged dragon hunters while trying to get home from a different realm and evading a psychopathic version of Lloyd's dad, was a little tiring.

So Cole had asked Jay if he wanted to go walk around the city with him and check out all the new reconstruction and just relax a bit.

The city had done really well in rebuilding, and the ninja had helped out any way they could. From helping families settle in again, to cleaning up the palace, helping shop owners stock up, and even building houses themselves with Jay and Nya's design talents. It had been about three weeks and almost half the city had been rebuilt. Cole had been impressed with the people of Ninjago's determination to help others. It was really cool in a way. Fortunately, not all of Ninjago was in ruins. The Sea of Sand had been untouched along with the Birch Wood Forest, but Jamanakai Village hadn't been so fortunate.

After the battle was over, Jay had raced off to his parents' junkyard with the others following suit. Once they all got there Jay practically burst open the door. Crying, sobbing, and screams of disbelief yet joy followed soon after. The others stood back and let the reunited family have their space but it didn't take long for them all to be reeled into a Walker family hug. Jay spent the night at his parents' that night but the others didn't mind. They knew that not only Ed and Edna needed it, but Jay too.

A visit to Ray and Maya, along with Lou followed the next day. Their reactions to Kai and Cole being alive was similar.

It had been beyond difficult for Lloyd and Nya to tell Ed and Edna, Ray and Maya, and Lou about what happened. For the Walkers to think that their only child—adopted child, Nya coldy remembered—was dead, Kai and Nya's parents to lose a child right after getting them back a little over a year ago, and Lou, for him to lose his wife and then his son almost 6 years later. Seeing a similar reaction three times did not make it any easier.

The ninja spent all of yesterday debriefing what had happened on both sides of the spectrum. Hearing the good and the bad, it was still nice for them to just sit and talk after not seeing each other for so long.

Cole was lost in memories of all that happened in the past few months until Jay's voice brought him back to the present.

"After then after we left the Temple I took Nya to her favorite restaurant on 5th street and we ate dinner and then we went for ice cream and she got strawberry and I got mint chocolate chip, did I ever tell you it was my favorite? Maybe I didn't. Oh well, it's my favorite. And I really missed eating ice cream and pretty much everything while we were in the first realm, and wasn't it crazy when I went pretty much insane. Anyway, then we went to the park as the sun was setting and then we kissed while we were—" Cole interrupted him by putting his hand over his mouth.

"Hey Jay, as much as I love listening to you talk, do you think I could have some peace quiet for a while?" Cole said sarcastically, removing his hand.

Jay rolled his eyes. "Yeah yeah, whatever. I'll shut up."

"Wanna grab a quick bite to eat before we head back? It's Kai's night to cook but I was thinking we could grab something to tie us over until then. I'm starving and I don't think I can wait two hours." Cole asked, checking his phone for the time.

"Yeah sure. Let me just call Nya and tell her what we're doing."

"Ok. Where do you want to go?"

"Uh it doesn't real-"

"Doesn't really what?" Cole turned around, seeing Jay's phone on the ground, but no Jay. "Jay? Jay, where did you go?"

But he was no where to be seen.

Jay found himself being dragged into an alleyway away from Cole and was thrown forcefully into a wall. He fell to the ground winded and a knife was held at his neck.

"Who are you? What the heck are you doing!" There were several other guys standing there, blocking the exit of the alley.

"You'll find out in due time. Now I suggest you quiet down before we make you quiet!"

"COLE! HEY! OVER HE-!" A cloth was held over his mouth and nose. Jay knew what they were doing and tried not to inhale, but as soon as he breathed in he couldn't fight the unconsciousness overtaking him.

Once Jay went limp, the leader yelled, "Get in the van boys."

The guys blocking the street moved out of the way and hopped into a black van. The leader picked Jay up and threw him in the back. Once he made sure no one saw, he jumped in as well.

—

"What do you mean you lost Jay!?" Lloyd yelled who was on the phone with Cole.

"I mean he just disappeared. One minute we're walking down Main, the next he's gone! I've already walked around six blocks looking for him. Nothing."

"People don't just disappear, Cole!" Kai yelled grabbing the phone from Lloyd.

"Just come back and we'll figure this out." Lloyd grabbed his phone back from Kai.

"Alright. Be there in 10." Cole summoned his dragon and flew back to the temple. He honestly had no clue what happened. He knew Jay was fast but he didn't see a reason for him to run away and even without telling him. He really hoped Jay was just playing some sick joke and he'd be back at the Temple laughing when Cole got there. But there was fear growing in the pit of Cole's stomach that he really wanted to ignore. What if something really bad happened? If that was the case it was his fault. He was suppose to not only have his team mate's back but his best friend's. Cole would never forgive himself if he just let something bad happen without even knowing.

True to his word, Cole got back to the Temple in 10 minutes. He dismounted off his dragon and ran inside to find his team meeting in the common room. But no Jay.

Crap.

Lloyd was the first to notice his presence. "Cole, great your here. We have a way we can find Jay."

"Really how?"

"Well, since you said that Jay dropped his phone, which has a tracking device, I tried to locate the tracker in his ear com. The com was strangely deactivated a while a ago but the tracker was able to pick up where he went." Nya explained.

"Yes. Although his tracker just recently shut off moments before you got here, we know the general place Jay could be. Just outside of Ninjago City." Zane added.

"That's weird. I'd been looking for about half an hour. He must've gone fast because it takes an hour to get outside the city."

"It is possible that wherever Jay went, it was in a vehicle, not going the speed limit I might add." Zane suggested.

"Great. So let's leave right away." Kai said pointing to the door.

"Now hold on, Kai. I want to find Jay just as badly as you do, but we need a plan. We don't know who or what we're up against or what even happened for that matter." Lloyd responded.

"Lloyd's right, Kai. It would be unwise to run off without any sort of idea of what's going on." Zane added.

"Alright then, what's the plan?" Cole asked.

"We'll head to Jay's last location and go from there."

"Okay so that will take around half an hour with our dragons but we should probably take the Ultra Sonic Raider. It's less conspicuous than our dragons. But taking it instead of our dragons means it would be an hour before we get here." Nya suggested.

"Okay lets do that then. We leave tomorrow. The suns already setting and looking in the dark without knowing what's going on isn't a smart move."

"Really Lloyd! We don't even know what happened. Are you sure it's smart to wait?" Kai questioned.

"I'd rather us be aware of our surroundings when we go. We're already exhausted. We leave at dawn."

—

As they reached their hideout Jay, still unconscious, was hoisted over one of the men's shoulder and carried into the building and in the basement where he was thrown to the floor.

"Leave him here until he wakes up. And lock the door."

—

It wasn't until several hours later when Jay started to stir. He sat up and rubbed his aching head. He was definitely not in his bed at the Temple. Looking around, he decided that wherever he was, it had to be some basement.

"Well I definitely didn't walk here, at least I don't think." He stood up but got a little light-headed, he balanced himself on the wall before he could fall on his face, and headed for the door. It was locked.

"What the heck happened anyway?"

And it came back. He remembered walking through town with Cole, then someone grabbed him. Then everything went black.

Suddenly, Jay heard the door open and a very very tall man came in, taller than Cole—who was past 6 feet. The guy was dressed in all black, along with two men behind him who were a bit shorter but nevertheless, way bigger than Jay was.

"Well well. Look who's up."

Jay didn't know who this guy was but the fact that he was just now opening the locked door, made him think he was the one responsible for this.

"Who are you?!" Jay questioned as he took a fighting stance, prepared to attack if needed.

"Hm, how cute. My name is Bates, and I'm about to be your worst nightmare." The guy named Bates apparently, snapped his fingers and one of the guys behind him started walking toward Jay with something that resembled a dog collar but made out of metal, a thick metal by the looks of it.

"Woah woah woah. Excuse me Mr. Beet but if that's what I think it is, there is no way your putting it on me. I'm not an animal."

"It's _Bates_. And you don't have much of a choice."

Jay tried to back away but the two other guys tackled him and put the collar around his neck. They latched it on so tight it made him choke. They let him go and Jay pulled on the collar with all his strength but it wouldn't budge.

"What's this a fashion statement." Jay joked, trying to hide the on-growing fear in the pit of his stomach.

Bates just smiled. He pulled out a little remote and pressed a button.

Jay immediately screamed in agony as his hands reached for the collar to yank it off. It was like thousands of hot knives were stabbing him at once. The collar had no give whatsoever and Jay's hands only burned as he pulled on said collar. He fell to his knees screaming.

It finally stopped and Jay fell over on his side gasping for air.

"It has a more functional purpose. You see, anytime you mis-behave, step out of line, or try and escape, you get shocked."

He pressed the button and Jay screamed again, unable to hold it in.

"H-how are you s-s-shoc-cking m-me." He breathed out weakly, still feeling the aftershocks.

Jay's element was lightning. Lightning couldn't hurt him, the worst it could do to would be a static shock. And that was definitely not a static shock.

"A little thing called Vengestone. I know elemental masters aren't immune to their element when near it, and making that collar out of Vengestone was such a great idea, don't you think?" He grabbed Jay's chin, forcing him to look at him.

"W-what do y-you w-w-want with m-me?"

"You are gonna help me send a little message to your friends. I'm willing to negotiate a trade with them."

"W-what kind of t-trade?" Jay started to get his breath back.

"There is something I desire and something they desire. You, for the Realm Crystal." Jay's eyes widened.

"No. You c-can't do that. T-they can't trade me for the c-crystal. It's t-too important! Why do you w-want it anyway?"

"He who has the power is in control. I'm going to unleash all kinds of havoc on this world, and rule Ninjago for myself. And I know I'll succeed, because I have a bargaining chip." He laughed.

"Y-you won't win. We will s-stop you."

"We?" He laughed. "I think your a little busy at the moment."

He turned his back toward Jay.

"I know your putting on this brave face. You pretend the part of a ninja but your just a child. Think about it? Would a real ninja allow himself to be caught and overpowered so easily? Hm?"

Jay inhaled sharply.

"T-there not gonna do it. The c-crystal is too important."

"More important than you? Let me ask you something. Do you think your friends will come and save you? Find a way to trick me into thinking I have the crystal and get you outta here? Or are they rejoicing right now because they don't have anymore dead weight on the team? Do you really think they're coming for you? Well let's send a message and find out."

Jay stayed quiet. He didn't want to believe what Bates said. It was true though. No way Cole, Kai, Lloyd, or the others would get captured so easily. Bates snapped his fingers again and one of the guys grabbed Jay's arms in a crushing grip and yanked them behind his back.

"Ugh get off me. Let me go!" His struggling did nothing but tire him out. A blindfold was then placed over his eyes.

"We can't have you seeing where you're going, Blue-bell."

He was forced to walk and started squirming more but couldn't get loose. The guy's grip was too strong. A few moments later he heard a door open and could tell they had walked through it. Jay was pushed into a chair-like thing and the blindfold was ripped off.

As Jay's eyes adjusted to the light he could see he was in fact in a chair in a different room. Before he could get up and run his arms were grabbed and wrenched rather painfully behind the chair and tied very tightly, he could feel the circulation being cut off. Bates wrapped a rope around Jay's chest, tying him to the chair. After he was done he walked in front of Jay and pressed the button again. Jay screamed not expecting it. He squirmed and struggled and kicked his legs as much as he could, trying to ground himself through the shocks. Jay could barely breathe and his body wracked with pain by the time it was over.

"That's for being difficult. Now be a good little boy and let them finish."

Jay didn't listen despite the warning and tried to break free. He got shocked again. His screams echoed through the building.

"Tsk tsk tsk. I was hoping we weren't gonna have any problems but I guess I stan-corrected." Jay could barely hear what he was saying over his ringing ears.

"Take care of his legs."

Jay saw one of the goons come and grab his legs but he didn't have enough strength to fight back after that. They tied his feet just as tight as his arms. Jay was on the verge of passing out when he felt a sharp prick in his arm and he suddenly woke right up.

"Adrenaline shot. You won't be getting much sleep here. Besides I need you awake for the message." Jay tried squirming again but the rope was so tight he could barely move.

"Trust me Blue-bell. You won't be getting out of here anytime soon." Bates laughed.

Jay hated that he was calling him that. Cole would call him Blue-Bell when they would joke around and this guy had no right to use that nickname. Besides, how did he even know about it?

Jay zoned out for a bit and he jumped when Bates grabbed his chin. He smiled creepily.

"Smile for the camera." He moved out of the way and Jay saw the worried faces of the guys.

"Jay!?"

* * *

 **I will try and get the next chapter out as soon as possible. Maybe even today if I get a chance. I will try to update at least once a week but I have two weeks until Christmas break and Finals are gonna kick my butt. I hope you enjoyed the first chapter of Fear and Guilt.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Possible trigger warning in this chapter-Panic attacks, mild language, and possesive nature over character**

 **I do not own Ninjago**

* * *

Cole was the first one up getting ready. As he looked over the city from the temple he heard a familiar voice.

"Cole? You okay?" He turned around to see Nya behind him with a worried expression.

"Yeah I guess." Cole sighed. "It's just, we have no clue what happened to Jay, what if he's hurt, or I don't know. What if we never find him? What if he got captured?"

"Hey now you're sounding like Jay," she chuckled. "He's strong. Stronger than we let on, he can get through anything. Believe me I would know." The images of Jay in the other timeline flashed in her mind. When they rescued him from Misfortune's Keep, he was hurt so badly, but he still had the determination to protect her no matter what. When it came down to it, his determination and compassion for others was unrivaled.

"He went through hell for me. We'll find him. I just wish I would've kissed him goodbye before you guys left."

Cole smiled and grabbed her hand. "Thanks, Nya. And hey, like you just said it's gonna be ok. We'll figure this out."

"EVERYBODY REPORT TO THE MAIN HALL. I REPEAT: EVERYBODY REPORT TO THE MAIN HALL!" Zane's voice echoed over the speaker.

Cole and Nya looked at each other worriedly and they ran inside.

"What is it Zane?" Lloyd was the first to ask.

"It's a video message."

"From who?" Kai asked, just running in.

"Some unknown location outside of Ninjago City. It says 'For Ninja: Regarding the Master of Lightning', should we answer, Lloyd?" Lloyd gave a nod and Zane flipped it on.

When the screen flickered to life they all gasped. What they saw was Jay tied to a chair. He was wearing a collar of some sort and it looked like he was twitching.

"Smile for the camera."

"Jay?!" They all said. Jay looked up from the ground and his eyes lit up.

"Guys? Guys! I'm so glad to see you."

"What happened to you! We were worried sick." Cole ask/yelled.

"And why the hell are you wearing a collar!" Nya spoke up angrily.

"I'm okay. Don't worry about me. But whatever this guy is about to tell you don't—!"

A piece of tape was practically slapped over Jay's mouth as he was in mid-sentence.

A man turned and faced the camera smirking.

"Ah there we go. Something to keep that motor-mouth shut. We can't have him giving away any classified information."

Jay grunted and gave the guy a death glare.

"What the hell are you doing!" Cole yelled.

The man just laughed. "No need to get over dramatic. Just trying to keep Zap-Trap here quiet."

Cole blew a fuse. "YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO CALL HIM THAT!"

Only he was allowed to call Jay by that nickname. Cole gave it to him the first week they met at the Monastery because Jay would just not shut up. For as long as Cole has known Jay, the latter has always embodied his element. Always moving, always talking, very loud and fast. He didn't give him the nickname to be mean-okay well maybe for the first couple of days it was meant to be mean- and there were times after first meeting Jay that Cole wanted to glue his mouth shut because the smaller boy continuously talked non stop. Not like anything has changed.

The man grabbed Jay's face in his hand and made him look at the camera. "He looks kind cute like this doesn't he." Bates chuckled.

Tears of shame were glistening in Jay's eyes.

"Enough games!" Lloyd yelled, speaking up. "Whoever you are, what do you want with Jay?"

The guy let go of Jay but still stood next to him. Jay kept his head down, trying to hide his face, he was ashamed that he let this happen.

"It's not a matter of what I want with him, it's a matter of what you'll do for me while I have him."

They saw him pull a little remote out of his pocket and he pressed a button. Jay's head immediately shot up as his whole body was filled with electricity.

Nya and Cole yelled, Kai and Lloyd could only stand speechless, while Zane was horrified.

When it finally stopped, it looked like Jay had passed out but someone came from behind the camera and injected him with something. Jay's head immediately shot up.

"There're giving him an adrenaline shot!" Zane clarified angrily.

While Jay was still recovering from the shock the guy spoke again.

"My name is Bates and I am willing to negotiate a trade. I want you to get me the Realm Crystal in exchange for your sorry excuse of a ninja. That is my deal. No exceptions. If you deny my offer, Blue-bell gets to stay with me."

He pressed the button again and Jay's muffled screams echoed.

"Alright we get it! STOP!" Lloyd yelled angrily.

"So very bossy, Greenie."

He let go of the button and Jay slumped over again. They injected more of the adrenaline stuff into him and he whimpered as he bolted upward.

"But if you get me the Realm Crystal you can have him back. Mostly, undamaged." He said smirking.

He pulled out a knife and stroked Jay's cheek, drawing a thin line of blood as Jay winced.

As Cole was watching Jay he saw his eyes glaze over and he immediately recognized what was happening. Jay started hyperventilating and tears started leaking out of his eyes. It caught the attention of Bates.

"Aww what do we have here? Are those tears I see?"

"HE'S HAVING A PANIC ATTACK YOU IDIOT. HE CAN'T BREATHE!" Cole shouted.

"Well that's not my problem now is it."

Jay _screamed_.

Louder than when he was being electrocuted even though it was muffled. He started struggling, kicking his legs and thrashing in the restraints.

"Jay, I'm so sorry. This is all my fault." Cole apologized.

"Well. What's your decision. It doesn't look like Blue-bell's doing too good here."

Jay was hyperventilating, he couldn't seem to draw in a full breath and the tape sealing his mouth wasn't helping.

Without hesitation they all nodded and Lloyd said, "We'll get you the Realm Crystal. No exceptions or tricks. Now tell us where you reside so we can rendezvous to the location."

Bates laughed again. "Now here's the trick. I won't tell you where we are. You'll have to figure it out. And you better hurry." He turned towards Jay, who was still in the middle of a full-blown panic attack, and forced him to look at the camera again. "Because if you don't get here soon, Blue-Bell is mine."

And with that the screen cut off.

The guys were at a loss for words. Nya was yelling.

"What are we suppose to do! Jay could be in a completely different place by now. How are we suppose to find him. We have no idea where to look and how long do we have!." Nya pounded her fists on the table.

"We have to get the crystal or he's gonna hurt Jay even more." Kai exclaimed as he placed a hand on Nya's shoulder.

"I know. I know." Lloyd said rubbing his head in thought.

"Here's the plan, Cole, Kai, and Nya, you guys go to Hiroshi's Labyrinth and get the crystal. Zane and I will stay here and try to pinpoint Jay's exact location. I will contact Cyrus Borg and let him know of our mission. It will take around four hours to get there so you guys have to hurry."

Everyone nodded and went to their assignments right away.

—

Jay heard Bates click the camera off and he walked over to him.

"There is no escaping me. They'll never find us. It's just you and me now."

Jay whimpered, trying to ignore him and focus on his breathing.

"How about we have some fun, huh?"

Jay didn't know what he meant but when the bad guys say "have fun" it usually means that you won't. Jay jerked against his bonds trying to get away and his body lit up with electricity again.

When it stopped he was still shaking and twitching.

"And you call yourself a ninja? Pathetic."

Someone came and untied Jay's chest from the chair. He was blindfolded again and carried into another room. They dropped him on the floor this time and Jay grunted. The blindfold was taken off and Bates was kneeling down in front of him.

"Let's get on with the fun!" Bates said with a smile.

One of the guards picked Jay up again and put him in another chair. His hands and feet were untied and secured in leather straps attached to the arms and legs of the chair. He pulled on he restraints but they wouldn't budge.

"There there." Bates said sadistically, walking over to Jay. "You have such pretty blue eyes."

He ripped the duct tape off Jay's mouth and started to stroke his hair.

"No, uh-uh stop! Get away! Don't touch me!"

Jay squirmed away from him as best he could.

"Aww it's okay Blue-Bell. You don't have to be scared. I'll take good care of you."

The shock collar activated again.

Jay writhed in pain and tears were streaming down his face by the time the electrocuting stopped.

Bates ran his fingers through Jay's hair again, it was just like Ma used to do to calm him down when he was younger, except Bates used it to do the opposite.

"How about this. You give me information on the ninja and we can stop this whole thing right now. Fail to meet my commands and you'll regret it. Like so."

He punched Jay in the stomach and he doubled over in pain as far as the restraints would allow. Jay let out a strangled cough, trying to catch his breath.

"Let's start simple. What's the red one's weakness."

"Like hell I'm gonna tell you. If you think I'm gonna say anything, you're out of your mind!"

"Oh Blue-Bell, this is gonna be a long day."

And Jay screamed.

—

"We should be there any minute now." Nya called from her dragon.

"Rodger that sis."

Cole wasn't paying attention to what they were saying. All he could think about was this whole ordeal. It's his fault Jay got captured.

Jay is a more than capable ninja, despite what they tell him from time to time, and he can take care of himself but Cole couldn't help but feel like this never would've happened if he had turned around in time.

Now Jay was suffering because of it. And when he had the panic attack Cole felt so _so_ guilty.

He knew about Jay's anxiety disorder. All the guys know he has anxiety, that's pretty obvious, but Cole is the only one who knows it's a disorder, aside from his parents.

The day Cole found out was at the Monastery. Sensei Wu had just gone out to recruit Zane at the time and Jay and Cole had the whole place to themselves. It was the first night Sensei left.

 _Cole had woken up to hear a noise coming from the other room. He looked over to Jay's bed in their shared sleeping quarters only to find it empty. It was 3:00 in the morning and, despite his overwhelming urge to ignore it and go back to sleep, decided to go and check it out. It was probably just Jay making a late night snack, he'd done it before._

 _Cole followed the noise to the bathroom and was right about it being Jay, he didn't however expect to see the smaller boy on the bathroom floor sobbing._

 _He could only stare, while Jay didn't seem to realize he was there. Jay was hugging his stomach with one arm and the other was covering his mouth, as if he was trying to quiet his crying. He was gasping for air like he couldn't breathe as sobs racked his body. Cole had to shake off the initial shock of seeing Jay like this, because up until now, Cole had never seen him with anything but a smile, he honestly thought it was annoying how someone could be so happy all the time._

 _Cole wasn't the best at comforting people and he'd only known the kid for a week but he couldn't just leave him here._

 _Cole crouched down next to Jay and gently touched his shoulder._

" _Hey Jay, it's ok. It's Cole, what's wrong?" Jay looked up with tear-stained eyes that were immediately filled with regret as he saw Cole._

" _Cole! I-I-I'm s-so sorry. I didn't m-mean to wake you. I'm so s-stu-pid." His voice broke on the last word._

" _Hey it's okay, you're not stupid. What happened?"_

" _It's noth-ing really, just a l-little p-panic attack. You can g-go back to bed, I-I'm f-f-fine." Jay hugged his stomach again, obviously expecting Cole to leave._

" _Jay, I'm not leaving you like this, you obviously aren't fine. You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to, but at least let me help. Okay?" Jay looked surprised but sheepishly nodded._

" _I think it w-was from just a really b-bad n-night-m-mare. I don't really w-want to talk about i-it." Jay hugged his stomach tighter._

" _You don't have to talk about it. It was just a dream, whatever you saw wasn't real. You're okay, alright?" Jay nodded._

 _"Does this," Cole was careful to tread lightly. "Do you get panic attacks often?"_

 _It was a simple question really, and it really shouldn't have caused Jay to start crying again, but it did. Cole decided to rub circles on his back and it seemed to calm him down._

" _Hey, hey, it's okay. You don't have to answer that. I'm sorry."_

 _Jay vigorously shook his head. "No no no, don't apologize. I-it's my f-fault. It's a simple question, why are you such an idiot!" The last part was directed toward himself._

" _Hey, don't say that. If it's not my fault, then it's not yours either. I don't think you could have prevented this. Panic attacks are unpredictable, you can't just stop them." Jay heard him but didn't respond. He didn't respond for a while._

" _Y-yeah, I uh, I-I get them a lot. I have, um. I have an a-anxiety disorder." This was the first time those words ever left his mouth._

 _Cole didn't know how to respond for a second. He really didn't know much about anxiety disorders but he has had a panic attack before, and he does know that they can be terrifying._

" _I've never t-told anyone before. O-only my parents know."_

" _How, how long have you had it?" Cole probably shouldn't have asked that but Jay didn't seem to mind._

" _Um, 6 years? S-since I was 9. I uh had therapy for a while but I hated it. They made m-me feel like I was crazy. I uh, it um, it causes me to freak out easily, and it um it causes me to hug things in my sleep and sometimes prevents me from s-sleeping. It um, ugh I'm sorry. It's stupid it really is, I didn't want you to find out let alone like this and you probably think I'm weird and you're not gonna want to be on my team anymore and how am I suppose to be a ninja if I'm scared by a little nightmare and I so sorry for waking you up I'm so stupid why can't I just be normal I'll only screw things up I can't be a ninja I'm sorry and..."As Jay was ranting, he started crying._

 _In hindsight he probably shouldn't have done it but Cole lunged forward and wrapped his arms around Jay. He'd read somewhere before to ask before you touch someone having a panic attack but Jay seemed to react well to physical contact before so Cole was willing to take a chance. It ended up being the right move because Jay immediately hugged back and sobbed. They stayed there for a while as Cole whispered soothing things in Jay's ear._

 _When Jay's sobs eventually died down, he let go of Cole. "I'm s-"_

 _Cole didn't let him finish. "Don't apologize. It's alright."_

 _After a few more minutes of Cole rubbing circles on Jay's back, the latter finally calmed down._

" _Sensei should know about it."_

" _No, you can't tell him. Please, I don't want him to treat me differently. I don't want you to treat me differently, I shouldn't have told you I didn't want to drag you down with me."_

" _Hey, I won't treat you any different. We've only each other for a week but you're still Jay, you're still an inventor who cooks and dabbles in poetry, still annoying as heck and nothing is gonna change that, Zap-Trap." Jay laughed between his tears. "This may be apart of you but it's not who you are, got it?" Jay nodded._

" _I won't tell Sensei but you have to let me help you. You don't have to go through this alone. Deal?"_

 _Jay smiled. "Deal."_

" _Now I don't know about you, but I say we try going back to bed."_

" _Yeah, that'd be great." They both stood up and made their way back to their shared bedroom. The clock said the time was now 4:45am. Before they got into their beds, Jay turned to Cole and wrapped his arms around him._

" _Thanks Dirtclod. For everything."_

 _Cole hugged him back. "Anytime Zap-Trap."_

And ever since then, Cole's always been there for Jay. He would always come to him during an attack if Cole hadn't found him first.

But this was the first time since Cole found out, that he wasn't able to calm Jay down, and that made him feel terrible.

"Cole. Cole! Earth to Cole!"

"Huh? Oh, yeah what's up."

"We're here. I've been calling you for like five minutes, dude. Are you ok?"

"Yeah yeah I'm fine. Let's just hurry and get the crystal." Cole, Nya, and Kai landed their dragons and de-summoned them.

"Ok. According to the map from Cyrus Borg, the crystal is stored in a high containment facility about 10 miles North from here. Borg told Lloyd that the Nindroids guarding the place should recognize us and let us in." Nya clarified looking at the coordinates on her phone.

Nya walked ahead of them since she was the one with the map. Cole felt Kai nudge his shoulder and looked at him.

"We'll get Jay back. I promise."

He smiled.

"I know it's just, maybe if I had turned around fast enough then this could have been avoided. He must hate me now. I did this to him."

"Whoa whoa whoa Cole. Hold on a sec. This is not your fault. And I can guarantee you that Jay doesn't blame you. He's not like that. Jay can handle himself. We'll find him. He's tough. And we will make Bates pay for this."

"Your right." Cole answered. "That's unusual." Kai gasped like he was offended and playfully shoved him. Cole smiled but it didn't last long.

"What are we gonna do about the Realm Crystal. We are without a doubt getting Jay back, but we can't give Bates the crystal. Who knows what he'll do to Ninjago with it." Cole said exasperated rubbing his head.

"We'll figure it out. We always do. I just hope Jay's holding up ok." Sighed Kai.

"He can take anything. It's pretty hard to keep him down. And I'm speaking from personal experience." They both laughed.

—

The three had been walking for an hour and a half now and for the most part it had been pretty quiet.

Nya was stressed. She would have given anything for Jay to be here right now. For Jay to crack a joke and Cole would playfully tell him he'd never get a gig as a comedian. A tear slipped down her cheek but she wiped it away. Nya really didn't want or need Cole or Kai to see her cry.

"We should be there soon. Only about a quarter mile left to go!" Kai shouted.

Nya grunted in annoyance. "Ugh! This is ridiculous! I'm really worried about Jay. We don't know what's happening to him. He's hurt I can't do anything! I feel so useless. And what if he doesn't make it out? What if Bates does something horrible to him, and I just want want my boyfriend home. I lost him once when you went to the other realm and I **can't** go through the same thing again."

"We'll get him back, Nya. No ninja left behind, remember?" Kai walked over and threw an arm over Nya's shoulder.

Cole joined the hug and spoke softly. "I know Jay, loves you with all his heart and we know he's not one to quit. He'll be okay."

"I'm just, just, scared." She hated to admit it, but it was true. Nya was terrified for Jay. With the small time that they saw Bates, they also saw what he was capable of. He caused Jay so much pain in just a matter of five minutes. Jay's been with him a whole day now. Who knows what he could've to Jay in that time.

"I know sis. We all are, but he'll be ok."

"Thanks." Nya said as she calmed down."We better hurry and get the Realm Crystal. The faster we can get it, the faster we get Jay." They nodded and ran the rest of the way to the crystal.

* * *

 **Hey look at that, I did update again today. I hope y'all enjoyed it! I'll update as soon as I can.**


	3. Not a chapter

**Hey y'all this isn't a chapter but I just wanted to let y'all know what's happening with this story. I'm losing inspiration for the story and already put that this story is discontinued in the summary, but I am willing to keep it going if y'all really want. If I do continue it don't expect a chapter for a while. As I currently have two stories I'm already trying to write. Just let me know via review or PM me. Thanks!**


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